Someone I Once Was
by WinchesterPartyofTwo
Summary: Dean Winchester wakes up from a car accident. Besides a concussion, he feels fine. He quickly notices that who he is now, was not who he was before the accident. Instead of cold and uncaring, he is happy, and caring towards others, especially his secretary, Castiel Novak. However, Castiel is battling demons of his own, and may just need Dean to help him overcome this battle.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own Supernatural, or any of the characters. I also have no extensive knowledge of the medical field, or about law offices.

All mistakes are mine.

Enjoy!

…

Dean blinked as his eyes adjusted to the bright light around him. It smelled clean, too clean. His mind was foggy. Where was he?

"Thank God you are awake!" a familiar voice said.

His brother Sam's blurry face soon came into focus. He looked both concerned and frightened.

"Hey Sammy" Dean managed to mumble out. "Where the hell am I?"

"At the hospital….do you not remember what happened?"

Dean gave him a blank stare.

"You were in a car accident. Some guy decided it was a great idea to drink his body weight in alcohol and then drive home. You were hit pretty hard. Concussion, broken ribs, nasty gash to your head and arm. Twenty-eight stiches later, here you are." Sam gave him another once over. "Do you remember now?"

Dean closed his eyes. The last thing he remembers was working late. He had to get his report out ASAP, and was forced to do an almost all nighter. Once It got to be 3:30am, he called it quits to get some sleep.

Suddenly, he remembered bright lights, a sickening crash, and sirens in the distance.

"Yeah, I think I can piece together what happened." Dean ran his hand over his forehead. His head was wrapped in gauze, and he felt the beginning of a major headache start up.

Just then, there was a knock at the door. A tall, middle aged doctor made her way to the bed.

"Mr. Winchester, I am glad to see that you are awake. You gave us a little scare. My name is Dr. Mills." The woman said.

"Uh…Hi." Dean couldn't find the energy to say anything more.

"How are you feeling?" Dr. Mills asked "Any nausea, headache, pain in your back or limbs?"

"I can feel a massive headache coming on, but other than that I feel ok. How long have I been out for?"

"Two days. You do have a pretty serious concussion, so that is most likely the cause of your headache. I will go ahead and order you some more pain meds. Do you remember what happened?"

"Umm, I remember working late, then on my way home I got hit by some bright lights, a loud crash, and then it's pretty much lights out." Dean was really hoping for some of those pain meds, his head felt like a balloon ready to burst.

"That is normal" Dr. Mills said "Like I said, you hit your head pretty hard. You may experience some memory loss, change in personality, frequent headaches. But nothing too out of the ordinary. I am going to have you stay the night tonight, and then you should be able to head on home tomorrow. I would suggest taking it easy these next few days. From what your brother had told me, you can be a bit of a workaholic." She gave him a small smirk. "If you can pull yourself away from the office for a few days, do it. If not, then please take it easy. I will make sure the nurse leaves my contact information in your discharge papers. If you notice anything out of the ordinary, or have any questions, please do not hesitate to call me."

Dr. Mills gave him a warm smile, and said she would be back in a couple of minutes with his pain medication.

Sam thanked her, and she left without another word.

Dean laid back, and covered his eyes with his hand. "Man, I might just have to take her up on that suggestion of taking a few days off. I feel like I could pass out at any moment."

Sam stared at him like he had just grown two heads. Not hearing a response, Dean removed one of his hands to glance at Sam.

"What?" He sat up a little more in his bed "What's wrong Sammy?"

Sam shook his head. "You're serious? YOU are going to take some time off work? Mr. Bad Ass Boss, I need to stay in the office as much as possible, not have a life, and take it out on others?"

Dean stared at him. "Well, if the doctor thinks I should take some time off, I think I should. At least a day. Hell, we both work at the same place, you can always check to make sure things are going a-ok!"

Dean was referring to the law office that he and Sam owned. Winchester & Winchester was their baby that they worked their asses off to open. Dean and Sam were both partners of the firm. There were several associates the worked beneath them, as well as many paralegals and their own secretaries.

Sam was confused. This sounded like a completely different Dean. The Dean he knew was a testy man, always at the office. Yelling orders to his team, running his secretary to the ground, and complaining nonstop. That Dean would never consider taking a minute off work.

He brushed it off for now. Dr. Mills did say that there could be temporary memory loss/personality change. Maybe this was just that.

Dean soon dosed off, and Sam left, telling the nurse to let him know when to be by to pick up Dean. His Impala was at Bobby's getting fixed, so Dean would need a ride.

…

Two days later, Dean found himself in his apartment. He decided he was going to head back to work tomorrow, so he was sifting through his massive email inbox. Most were from his secretary, informing him of meetings with clients, phone conferences, and a few reports that he has asked him to write up. He answered as many as he could before taking a break.

As he was making himself lunch, he looked around, his apartment looked bland. He thought to himself that he should redecorate a bit.

In the midst of his daydream, his phone rang. He looked at the name on the screen and answered immediately.

"Hey Castiel, what can I do for you?" he said to his secretary.

"Uhh, hi Mr. Winchester…umm, I-I'm so sorry for interrupting you while you are recovering. S-Sam mentioned that you are going to be back tomorrow, and I normally would not have bothered you, but I-I…"

"Cas, get to the point, what's up man? Something wrong with the Hernandez case? I just read the report, it looked great."

Cas hesitated a moment. "Um, no. I-I was just wondering if I would be able to come in a little late tomorrow? I had to reschedule my doctor's appointment, and the only time they had open was tomorrow morning at ten. I can be at the office by noon! I am so, so sorry. I can stay late every day this week, I will do more reports for you, whatever, I am so sorry!"

Dean held his phone away from his ear, wincing at the increase in volume. "Whoa, Cas, don't worry about it. It is not a big deal at all. I will see you at noon, and if you need to come in later, just shoot me a text."

"Really?" Castiel sounded shocked.

"Yeah, take your time man. Listen, I have to get back to my mountain of emails, I will see you tomorrow, ok?"

"Y-Yes Mr. Winchester. Thank you so much."

"Not a problem"

With that, Dean hung up and went back to his laptop. He had to get his things ready for work tomorrow.

…

Castiel sat staring at his phone. Had that really just happened?

"Well, what did he say?" Castiel's brother, Gabriel asked.

"H-He said it was ok, and if I needed to come in even later, then that was ok as well." Castiel was stunned. That was not his boss he just got done talking to. His boss would have yelled at him, told him how a good employee would not need to call in, told him he needed to work extra hours…he would have not liked him calling in late.

"Well, then I guess you didn't need me after all!" Gabriel said. Castiel had asked him to stop by while he called Dean, incase Dean did not allow him to come in late. Gabriel knew how important this appointment was to him, and he was not afraid to stand up to the eldest Winchester.

Gabriel worked at Winchester and Winchester as well. He was a paralegal, but he mostly worked with Sam. The few times he worked with Dean, there had been loud fights, and punches were almost thrown. Gabriel and Dean butted heads constantly; he was not afraid to tell Dean how he felt. That is why Castiel asked him to stop by.

"Yeah, I guess you didn't need to." Castiel was still staring at his phone.

"Well bro, I gotta go. Please, please let me know how the appointment goes tomorrow. Oh, and you still owe me that caramel macchiato, for stopping by! Extra sweet, extra whipped cream, and tell them to not skimp on that delicious caramel drizzle!" With that, Gabriel was gone, exiting out of Castiel's apartment.

Castiel watched him exit, and then put his phone down. What was going on with his boss? I guess he will see tomorrow.

He went to prep his bag for work, it was going to be a long day tomorrow.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I do not own Supernatural, or any of the characters. I also have no extensive knowledge of the medical field, or about law offices.

All mistakes are mine.

Constructive criticism is always appreciated, Enjoy!

…

Castiel looked down at his hands that were on his lap, he was speechless.

"Mr. Novak, please don't fret, we are not sure what we are dealing with yet. We will do a biopsy, and I will let you know where we go from there." His doctor said.

Castiel looked up and nodded. "Ok, I understand."

His doctor stood up and clamped a hand on Castiels shoulder. "It will all work out Castiel. I will walk you down to the room the procedure is done in. I advise you to rest today, if you must go to work, no strenuous activity. The results should be back in a week."

"Thank you Dr. Milton."

...

Dean rode in his Impala on his way to work. He was so glad that Bobby was able to get his Baby fixed up in such a short amount of time. She looked perfect. No one would've known she was in an accident.

He pulled into his office building and rolled up his car window. Grabbing his briefcase and cup of coffee, he walked toward the entrance.

Walking through the doors, he nodded and waved at the security guard. He pressed the up button on the elevator and waited. Once the elevator dinged, the door opened, and a red headed lady stepped off.

"Good morning Charlie." Dean said.

"Oh, um, Hi Mr. Winchester. Good morning! I am, um, just going to get my briefcase from my car. I forgot it. But, don't worry, I will have that report to you asap!"

Dean scrunched his eyebrows together. "Don't worry about it, take you time. Go grab a coffee while you are at it, it sounds like you need one!" With that, he stepped onto the elevator, leaving a confused looking Charlie walking away.

"Hold the elevator!" a voice screeched.

Dean looked up from his phone quickly, and put his arm out to stop the doors from closing.

Gabriel Novak stepped into the elevator.

"Well, well, I will have to say, I am surprised that you actually cared enough to hold the elevator. Last time we were in this position you pressed down the "door close" button in my face. Did you get laid last night? You are usually a little nicer after you have gotten some."

He hit the number for the 7th floor.

Dean looked at him. "I woul-"

"Save it Winchester, I don't want to hear it" Gabriel looked up at Dean, the height difference obviously not bothering him "I will say this though. Thank you for finding the one caring speck of bone in your body, and not giving Cas a hard time about coming in late today. I am glad you did not give him trouble, because I would have beat you down. Cassie doesn't need your shit, especially now. I don't know why he even still works for you, but he does. Just leave him alone."

The elevator dinged, and they both stepped out.

"Gabriel, I have no idea what you are talking about. Cas has worked for me over 5 years. I have no reason to cause him any grief."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, like the time he called in sick while puking his guts out, and you told him he would have to work overtime for the next two weeks? Or what about when his car broke down? You sat yelling at him on the phone until the tow truck came, and then continued when he got here. Just let him be. He is going through enough without you being a huge bag of dicks." With that, Gabriel turned towards the left and went to his cubicle.

Dean stood there for a few moments, then turned to the right to go his office. He went to unlock the door and found a few sticky notes stuck to it. He pulled them off and walked inside. Setting his briefcase on his desk, he sat down and logged into his computer. While it was loading, he read over the sticky notes. One was from Sam, reminding him that they have a meeting at 10. One was from Cas, saying that he sent the last of the requested reports over to him, and once again apologizing for being late today. The rest were simply welcome back/get well messages from coworkers.

His computer loaded, and he went straight to his emails. He spent a few minutes browsing through them, before his office messenger popped up. It was from Sam.

 _Sam W: Hey! Welcome back! I am sure you were dying to get back into the office._

 _Dean W: Eh, it is nice to get back into the routine._

 _Sam W: I bet! Did you get my message about the meeting at 10? It should not be long. Just going over some preliminaries._

 _Dean W: Yeah, I got it. Sounds good_

 _Sam W: Ok, great! I will stop by around 9:45. We can get some coffee before it starts._

 _Dean W: Ok._

 _Dean W: Oh, and by the way, do you know what is up Gabriel's ass today? I got chewed out in the elevator for nothing. Going on and on about me being a dick to Cas._

 _Sam W: I have no idea._

 _Sam W: But you are kind of hard on him._

Dean stared at the screen, not knowing what to say next.

 _Sam W: Maybe just get him a nice card or something. It is his birthday next Monday. I am sure he would appreciate it. Cas does do a lot for you. Anyways, I gotta go, see you soon._

Before Dean could even process anything, there was a knock at his door. Charlie stood there, now with a briefcase in hand.

"Good morning again. I have the papers that you requested." She stepped in and handed them over to him.

"Thanks Charlie" Dean took them and glanced at them briefly.

"Did I do them wrong? I knew I should have stayed later to look over them more, I am sorry. Let me see them and I will redo them."

Dean looked up at her. "Charlie, they look fine. I will go over them more after my meeting at 10. Don't be so hard on yourself"

"Really? Um, I don't think I have ever heard you say that." She looked down at her feet, then back at him. "I am going to go back to my desk now, if you need me to revise anything, just let me know" She then walked out of the door.

Dean was confused. Why did it seem like people were walking in circles around him? When he waved at Benny the security guard this morning, he looked like he was about to faint in shock. Then, when he walked to his office, people were happily chatting amongst each other in their cubicles. When they say him, they scatted away to their desks and started working immediately. Now, this whole this with Charlie.

Not to mention the conversation with Castiel last night, and Gabriel's words in the elevator.

He was just about to open an email that popped up on the computer screen when Sam walked in.

"Hey, you ready? I know I am here a little earlier than I said, but maybe we can grab a quick breakfast along with our coffee? I am starving"

Dean nodded. He stuffed his notes he would need for the meeting into his briefcase, and followed Sam out, locking the door behind him.

…

"I don't get it Sammy, I feel like some huge bad guy here. Everyone seems so skittish around me." Dean took another bite of his omelet.

"Well, Dean. You are kind of a dick. This isn't the first time I have told you this." Sam was cutting into his own omelet and taking a bite.

"But, I don't get it, I don't even know what I did. People are scared to talk to me, Cas sounded like he was going to hyperventilate on the phone late night, and poor Charlie looked like she was going to faint in my office." Dean looked confused. "I guess I am just an intimidating person."

Sam looked at him. "Dean, do you remember anything from before the accident?"

"Well, no shit Sammy, of course I do, it is not like I suffered amnesia or something" Dean rolls his eyes and takes a bite of bacon.

"There is the Dean I know" Sam returned the eye roll. "I know you remember your job, your family, your coworker, that kind of stuff. But do you remember YOU?"

"What kind of question is that? Of course I remember me. I can't just forget me Sam."

Sam gave him a look. "No, I mean, your personality. You said that Gabriel was talking about the time you made Cas work two weeks of overtime. Do you remember you doing that? Do you remember the way you talked to people? That kind of stuff"

Dean stared at his food. He really did not remember that stuff. But, how could he forget that? This made no sense.

Sam could tell that Dean did not remember.

"Dean, don't worry, Dr. Mills said there could be memory loss, or a change is personality. If it is still bothersome to you in a week or two, then we can always have you looked at."

Dean finished his bacon, and put his napkin on the plate. "Yeah, I guess so. I just don't get how I could have been such a dick and not know it. Hell, I don't even have the urge to yell at anyone now, how could I have been doing that just over a week ago?"

"I don't know Dean, but who knows, maybe this is your chance to be Dr. Jekyll instead of your usual Mr. Hyde" Sam smirked at him.

Dean threw a balled-up napkin at him. "Let's go, we are going to be late for the meeting"

…

Castiel rushed into the office building, hastily giving a wave to Benny and pushing to up button on the elevator several times. It was a little past noon, but he did not believe Dean when he said he could take more time off that necessary. He just hoped he would not have to do overtime again.

Once he reached the 7th floor, he ran to Gabriel's desk. He was not there, but he set down his disgustingly sweet caramel macchiato onto the desk. He then ran over to his desk.

He glanced into Dean's office and saw the door closed and the lights off. Good, he was still in his meeting.

"Well, hello there Cas, what brings you in so late?" Charlie came over and said. She had a big smile on her face. Castiel and Charlie were good friends.

"Doctors appointment" Cas said, logging into his computer.

"Sounds like fun, you didn't miss too much here, just the boss man acting really odd." Charlie was digging through the candy bowl Castiel kept on his desk.

Cas looked up suddenly. "Oh no, was he mad? I knew I shouldn't have taken the morning off, now I am going to be working overtime all week! I should send him another email apologizing, maybe he will take pity on me." He went to open his email.

"Whoah, Cas, take a chill pill. He was not angry at all…which is the weird part. He was…happy? I don't know, but he was definitely not himself. He actually gave me a compliment, which I have never seen." She shrugged. "Maybe this accident had an impact on him, who knows."

Castiel was uncertain if Charlie was just saying this to make him feel better, or if Dean was actually in a good mood.

"Anyways" Charlie said "Your birthday is next week! That is the important thing. What do you want? Do you want to go out to dinner? That new sushi place just opened, and I am dying for some good sushi."

"Uh, sure. That sounds good. I have not have good sushi in forever. Let's go there after work on Monday?" Cas smiled, he liked hanging out with Charlie, she always seemed to put him in a good mood.

"It's a date! Well, not a date, since you are not a woman, but nevertheless, I will be there! I see the boss man coming, so I am out of here. Talk to you on messenger!" She scurried off to her desk.

Castiel smirked, but then it went away when he say Dean talking with Sam. Dean was laughing at something, then he turned and started to walk to his office.

Cas went to open his mouth to say something, but Dean beat him to it.

"Cas! You are here! Perfect. How was your appointment? I hope all went well."

Cas stared at him. "Uh, Y-yeah, it went fine. Um, I apologize again if I-"

"Cas, what did I say, it is not a problem, things come up. I have another meeting in an hour. I sent you an email this morning with a task list I want done for the day. If you do not get it done, just let me know. The rest can be finished tomorrow." Dean smiled and unlocked his office door.

Cas was still staring when Dean sat down at his desk. The ping of his messenger snapped him out of his trance. He looked at the screen.

 _Gabriel N: Bro! This macchiato is PERFECTION! Thanks a bunch! How did the appointment go?_

 _Castiel N: I am glad you are enjoying your sugar rush. They did a biopsy, I will know the results next week._

 _Gabriel N: Well, keep me up to date. If you want me to come with you for the results, let me know, Sam won't mind me taking a few hours off._

 _Castiel N: Must be nice to have a boss like that._

 _Gabriel N: How was dickbag? Did he give you any trouble about being late? Be honest with me!_

 _Castiel N: Dean was actually ok with it still. He smiled at me. I have no idea what is going on, but it is a nice change._

 _Gabriel N: He must have gotten laid. Anyways, got to go. I have a lunch date with that hot chick on the second floor! ;)_

Castiel rolled his eyes and opened up the morning email from Dean. He read over it and started up on the tasks due for today. It was nice to not have any deadlines, even if it may only be for today.


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I do not own Supernatural, or any of the characters. I also have no extensive knowledge of the medical field, or about law offices.

All mistakes are mine, constructive criticism is welcome!

Enjoy!

…

Monday rolled around, and Castiel was in a great mood. It was his birthday today. He had woken up to a text message from his brother saying that he was going to bring him breakfast at the office, so do not worry about that.

Shortly after that, Charlie texted him confirming their sushi plans for tonight. Today was going to be a great day.

He was just about to step out the door when his neighbor across the hall opened her door. A little boy came sprinting out carrying a colorful handmade card.

"Mr. Novak, Mr. Novak! Happy Birthday! I made you a card!" The boy screeched.

"Ben, there is no need to scream." His mother scolded.

"Sorry Mom, I am just so excited!" Ben handed Castiel the card, looking proud of himself.

"Thank you Ben, I love it!" Castiel said. Ben smiled wider. Castiel looked at the woman. "Good morning Lisa."

"Good morning Castiel, Happy Birthday! I hope we are not bothering you."

"Oh, no, I am just on my way to work." He smiled.

"I made that card in art class in school! I accidently used too much glitter." Ben smirked

"I think it is perfect. Thank you Ben." Castiel ruffled Ben's hair.

"Ok Ben, we have to get you to school, and I am sure Mr. Novak has to get to work" Lisa said. They waved goodbye to Castiel as he locked his apartment door.

…

Castiel arrived at his desk to find a huge fruit arrangement waiting for him. It was beautiful, with all different kinds of fruits, as well as chocolate covered strawberries and pineapples. He looked around for a card, but did not see one. He opened up the plastic and sampled one of the strawberries. It was perfect. He lifted up the basket and went to take it to the fridge.

On the way to the fridge he ran into Dean.

"Oh, um Mr. Winchester, Hi. I was just putting this in the fridge, and then I will go and log in." Castiel stuttered out.

"Relax Cas, what have I said, call me Dean. You do not need to call me Mr. Winchester. Anyway, it's your birthday! I see you found the fruit basket I left on your desk. Do you like it?" Dean looked uncertain.

Castiel was speechless. In the five years he has worked for Dean Winchester, he has never given him a gift, let alone even remembered when his birthday was. Granted, ever since his accident he has been a different man, but he never expected this.

"I love it, thank you very much" Castiel gave him a smile.

Dean let out a breath "I am glad. I have to get back to my office for a conference call. Happy Birthday Cas."

Castiel thanked him again and went to place the fruit in the refrigerator.

Back at his desk, he logged in and opened his emails. He did not get a chance to do anything else before a box of delicious smelling food was placed in front of him.

"Happy Birthday Cassie!" Gabriel yelled.

Castiel looked up and smiled at his brother. "Thank you Gabe, this smells delicious!"

"Trust me, it is. I got you your usual. Eggs, over easy, extra bacon, hash browns, and a large coffee. Two creams, three sugars."

"Thank you again, I really appreciate it." Gabe winked at him before turning to go towards his desk.

Castiel opened up the box and started to dig in. He was responding to a few of Dean's clients when Charlie stopped by.

"So, I couldn't help but see this large fruit arrangement in the fridge. Know anything about that?" She smiled.

"Yes Charlie, it is mine, and yes, you can have some." He smiled knowingly at her. "Dean gave it to me."

"Oh really?" She didn't look as shocked as he thought she would be. "Well, maybe we all really have been graced with a new Dean Winchester. I sure as hell hope so, I don't think I can take going back to all that drama after the nice week we have had." She snagged one of Cas's bacon strips. He looked up to glare at her, but instead his eyes went wide.

"What?" She said around a mouth full of bacon.

"Well, Miss Bradbury, I am glad that you are liking this "new Dean" as everybody seems to call it." Dean smirked at her when she turned around looking like a deer caught in headlights.

"Oh, Mr. Winchester, uh, I, um, I didn't mean to-" Charlie looked speechless for once.

Dean grinned. "Charlie, really, it is ok. I am glad that you find the new work environment pleasurable. I do not want my employees to feel uncomfortable. Oh, and please, call me Dean. This whole "Mr. Winchester" is way too formal."

"Well, thank you Dean. I, uh, I am going to go back to my desk. See you tonight for dinner Cas!"

Castiel waved at her, then looked expectantly at Dean, who was holding a large stack of papers.

"Well, I hate to do this to you on your birthday, but would you be able to file these reports away for me? The Hernandez case is finally going to be closed. I am writing up the report now."

"Sure thing Dean." Castiel grabbed the stack and got to work.

…

"Come on Cas!" Charlie has been hovering at Cas's desk for the past 10 minutes. "Our reservation is at 6, we are going to be late!"

"Charlie, it is 5:15, the place is 5 minutes away, we are not going to be late." Cas was in the middle of sorting papers that needed to be shredded. "I just need to finish this, then shred this stack. It will take 15 minutes tops."

"Ugh, fine. I am going to go to the ATM across the street. When I get back, I expect you to be ready!"

"Fine, fine." Cas grabbed his stack and went to the shredders. When he entered the room, Dean was standing at the printer.

"Fuck you, you ass!" Dean kicked the printer, it was obviously jammed. "Oh, Cas, what's up, aren't you done for the night?"

"Yeah, um, I just wanted to finish shredding these papers."

"Ok, but don't stay too late, you need to celebrate!" Dean finally got his papers from the printer. "Did you by chance get the Hernandez case report I set on your desk? I need that retyped and revised by ASAP."

"Yes, I saw it. I will make sure it is done first thing in the morning." Castiel finished his shredding and looked up at Dean.

"You are the best Cas, thanks!"

Castiel watched Dean's retreating form. He took a deep breath and went to get his things together. Charlie was going to be back any minute.

He grabbed his phone and saw a voicemail on it. He listened to it quick.

"Hello Castiel, this is Dr. Milton. I am calling to let you know that your results are back. It is important that we meet in person to discuss our findings. I have an open appointment at 5:30pm tomorrow. Please let my receptionist know if this works for you."

Castiel closed his eyes and ran his hand down his face. This was not what he wanted to hear. He quickly called and confirmed that the time works for him. As he was hanging the phone up, Charlie rounded the corner.

"Castiel Novak, are you ready? It has been 20 minutes, and I want some sushi now!"

"Yes, I am ready." Castiel put on a smile. He was not going to let that phone call ruin his night.

…

"So, Dean actually remembered your birthday? That is some crazy shit. I didn't even think he knew my name a week ago." Charlie was munching away on her California rolls, obviously happy with how they tasted.

"Yeah, uh, I didn't think he even cared." Cas said. "It was a pleasant surprise. I hope this Dean stays with us, it makes work much more pleasant. Castiel got the spicy tuna rolls, and they were delicious.

"Well, between you and me, I was listening into Sam talk with Inias. He was saying how Dean could stay like this, all happy and pleasant, or could start to become the monster we know him as. Apparently he hit his noggin pretty hard."

"Well, either way I have no choice but to stay. The benefits are amazing."

"Yeah, they definitely are." Charlie took another bite of sushi.

"So, how are things going with Dorthey?" Cas wanted to change the topic, as much as he liked his bosses new attitude, he really did not want to talk about it.

"Oh my, I do not even know where to start. Things seemed to be going well, but then she stopped texting me. Then she called me last week for a quick hook up. Ever since then I have heard nothing from her." Charlie sighed. "I am going to call her sometime this week and see where we stand.

"That stinks. Maybe you should go after that girl you met online? She seemed pretty legit." Cas offered.

"But she did not like Harry Potter, so I lost interest" Charlie sighed. "It's ok, I am still young, I have plenty of ladies to mingle with!"

Cas laughed and ordered another round of drinks for them.

…

Dean sat on the floor of his bedroom. He was looking through a photo album he had kept. The pictures in it ranged from when he was a baby up until just recently. From what he could see, he looked happy. He was smiling in most of the pictures. One picture caught his eye. It was taken about six months ago. It was of him and Sam. They were both dressed in a suit, standing in front of their office sign. That was the day they took on one of the biggest cases of their career. Sam was smiling bright, Dean however, only had a small smile on his face.

Regardless, he looked happy.

Dean shut the book, he just did not see the person he used to be, the person everyone still sees him as. He wished he could remember that Dean, just so he could vow to never be him again. He hated how people were reluctant to talk to him, how they were scared to make him angry. He let out a big sigh.

The only thing he could do from now on was just continue on as he sees fit, definitely not unhappy, and definitely not a "dick" as Sam puts it.

Feeling a massive headache coming on, Dean goes to take a hot shower and get ready for bed.

…

The next morning Castiel was fretting, he was on the verge of a meltdown. He frantically searched his desk from top to bottom to find the Hernandez case report Dean left on his desk yesterday. He knew he saw it, it was here yesterday. A sinking feeling started as he thinks he knows what happened to it.

Dean is not in the office yet, so he vows to search everywhere before he starts to full on panic. He retraces his steps, going to Gabriel's desk, Charlie's desk, the elevator bay, the restrooms, the lunchroom, until finally standing in front of the place he hopes it is not in; the copy/shredder room.

He opens the door and starts looking. There is no way he is going to go through the shredded papers, but maybe he accidently left it in here. He looks on the printer, the copier, on top of all the boxes of paper, and on top of the shredder. No such luck. He is about to give up and look somewhere else when he glances a piece of paper stuck in the shredder. He clicks the button to reverse the shredder and feels his stomach drop. Here, in front of him is what remains of the Hernandez reports cover page. It is shredded halfway, and completely ruined. Cas feels like he is going to cry. If this is the cover page, that means the rest of the report has been shredded into a million microscopic pieces.

It was times like this that Cas wished that Dean did all his editing on the computer. He has worked for Dean for five years, he knows how he works. He first types and outline of what the report should look like. Then, he prints it out and handwrites all the important points he wants to include onto the paper. The papers are usually covered with pen scribbles that has taken Castiel forever to decipher.

After that, Dean hands off the papers to Castiel to type into an official report.

How could he be so stupid! How could he have shredded this report without knowing! Dean is going to kill him. This is it, he is going to be the one who snaps happy, caring Dean out of his trance.

Sulking back to his desk, he began thinking of what he could say to Dean. He glanced at his watch, Dean should be here in about 15 minutes. That will give him time to think up a speech.

But, just his luck, he goes to his desk and sees Dean in his office, laughing historically at something one of the associates was saying.

 _At least he is in a good mood._ Castiel thought.

He sat in his chair and logged in, hoping that the guy would stay in Dean's office for a while. He opened up his messenger and decided to message Gabriel.

 _Castiel N: Good morning Gabriel. Are you still coming with me to the doctors after work?_

 _Gabriel N: Yes sir! Please try not to worry, whatever it is, we will work through it. How was your birthday? Did you eat your body weight in sushi?_

 _Castiel N: Haha, no. Unlike you, I do not consume copious amount of foods anytime I can._

 _Gabriel N: Hey! I do not do it all the time! Well, maybe I do go on a sweets binge once a week, but that is not the point!_

 _Castiel N: Whatever._

 _Castiel N: Dean is going to kill me, I accidently shredded the Hernandez case file._

 _Gabriel N: OMG_

 _Gabriel N: How did you manage to do that!? Do you need me to come down there while you talk to him?_

 _Castiel N: It is a long story, I will tell you later. No, please don't come down. I need to fight my own battles. Someone is in his office now, so I have some time to practice my speech._

 _Gabriel N: If I hear any commotion, I am coming down!_

 _Castiel N: I gotta go, the guy is leaving._

Castiel looks up as the gentleman exits Dean's office. He smiles at Cas as he heads towards the elevator. Cas takes a deep breath and stands up. He walks as slowly as he can to Dean's office and knocks on the door frame.

Dean looks up and smiles at him. "Cas! Hey, what's up?" He takes a sip of his coffee. "How is that case report coming? I just got word that I need it complete by tomorrow morning. I know it is long, so I apologize"

"I-I was just coming to talk about that. You see, I-"

"Is my handwriting that bad? I swear, I need to start editing on my computer. It will save you from having to decipher my chicken scratch." Dean chuckled and took another sip of coffee.

"No, no, it is not that." Castiel looked as though he was going to cry. "I-I-I am so sorry, I was looking for the report this morning, a-and I could not find it. I retraced my steps and found the Hernandez reports cover page halfway in the shredder. I m-must have shredded it by accident. I am so, so sorry Dean." Castiel bit his lip and tried his very best to hold in the tears threatening to escape.

Dean looked at him with an emotionless expression. He set his coffee cup down and faced the window behind him. He was silent for a couple of minutes. Castiel was about to say something when Dean slammed his fist on the window, hard.

"GOD DAMN IT!" Dean screamed.

Castiel jumped back, the tears now falling freely down his face. "D-Dean, I-I will do anything to make this up to you. I-I will work nonstop tonight and tomorrow, I-" Castiel let out a sob.

Dean turned around from the window. He was furious. "Cas, how could this have happened! You have never done this! I-I can't believe this. Do you KNOW how LONG it took me to write all my notes?" He just about screamed the last part.

"D-Dean, please. I will do anything. J-Just, please don't fire me. Please. I n-need this job, I promise this won't ever happen again. I am so sorry. Just, please, let me know what I can do to help!" Cas was begging Dean, tears streaming steadily down his face.

Dean's face immediately softened. He looked at Castiel and saw the state he was in. He then glanced up to the windows by his office door. People were looking curiously into the office with a mix of emotions on their faces. He walked around Cas's shaking form and closed his office door and drew the blinds down.

Once he turned around, he placed a hand on Cas's shoulder. Cas flinched, but looked up at Dean.

"Listen, Cas, I am sorry. That is not the way I should have reacted. I-I just-" Dean took a calming breath. "it just took me a long time to compile my thoughts about the case onto my report. It is my fault as well for being so old school with my reports"

Castiel looked at Dean, uncertain if he should say something or not. He felt a tear run down his cheek and went to wipe it off. He was surprised when Dean beat him to it and wiped it away with his thumb. Realizing what he did, he took his hand away and took a step back.

"Anyways, why would you think I would fire you Cas? Everyone makes mistakes. This just happens to be a big one…." Dean ran a hand down his face "We can fix this." He smiles and sat down at his desk, motioning for Cas to sit in the seat across from him.

"Well, you have threatened to fire me in the past for much less than this, s-so I just figured this would be the time I blew it." Cas reached for the box of tissues on Dean's desk and wiped his nose.

Dean looked at him oddly for a few moments. "Well, that was the past. The important thing to focus on now is how to write this beast up. I have the outline on my computer, but unfortunately, not my notes."

"I really am sorry Dean, whatever you need me to do, just tell me" Cas said

"Well, today is pretty open, so I will try to write up as much as I can here. I may just need to pull all-nighter." Dean said

"Did you want me to stay late too?" Cas really did not want to, but it was his mistake. "I have an appointment after work, but I can come back afterwards"

"Nah, it is my report, I will take care of it. If I have to work on it tonight, I will just work on it at home." Dean didn't say this, but the look that Cas gave him when he yelled at him was enough for Dean to let him off the hook. He never wanted to make anyone that frightened again, and if that meant he had to bust his ass to write his report, then so be it.

"I will give you a call if I need help. In the meantime, could you please run across the street and get me a cup of coffee?" Dean reached into his wallet and pulled out some cash. "Also, get a box of coffee and some donuts too, I am sure everyone here can use a sugar rush." He winked at Cas. "Bring Charlie to help, I am sure she could use a break from her work"

Cas took the money, dumfounded, and then exited the office. He rounded up Charlie and they were off.

…

"So, you literally shredded his report notes for the biggest case of his career, and he basically let you off the hook? He raised his voice and then actually apologized?" Charlie look shocked as she grabbed the two boxes of donuts from the cashier. "THEN he sends you to get coffee and donuts for the office? I swear, I do not know this man. He has never gotten food for the office, let alone acknowledge us."

"I don't know Charlie, but I am not going to question it." Cas grabbed the huge box of coffee, as well as Dean's normal coffee order. "I am just glad I still have a job"

They headed back to the office, where they were greeted with many surprised faces when they announced who bought them the breakfast treats.

…

Many exhausting hours later, Gabriel and Castiel sit in the doctor's office waiting for Dr. Milton to come in the room. Castiel had been on edge all day with the whole shredding incident, that he almost forgot about his appointment. When Gabriel came to get him, all the worry came back in an instant.

"Hey, Cas, please take a breath." Gabriel put a hand on Cas's knee. "We don't even know the results yet."

No sooner had he said that did Dr. Milton knock on the door and enter the room.

"Good evening Castiel, Mr. Novak." He said to them. He sat down in his chair and took a deep breath. "As you know, the cat scan that you had a couple weeks ago showed a mass on your brain. We now have the results of the biopsy to see if it is cancerous or not."

"Yes, I know. What are the results." Cas just needed an answer. The constant headaches, dizziness, loss of balance, mild confusion. All of these symptoms he tried to brush away as stress until Gabriel dragged him to be looked at by a doctor. Now, here they were.

"Castiel, the results show that you have stage 2 brain cancer." Dr. Milton said "The good news, is that it does not seems to be spreading aggressively. There is a great chance that we can treat this."

Cas had no idea what to say. He has cancer? No, this can't be right, there is no way that these headaches are cancer.

"Headaches are the most common symptom of brain tumors." When Cas looked up, he realized that he must have said what he was thinking aloud.

Gabriel spoke up, realizing that Cas needed to process what he has been told. "What treatment are we talking about Doc? Chemotherapy? Surgery?"

"Chemotherapy is the most effective. The tumor is in a place where surgery would be dangerous. However, if the chemo does not show signs of improvement, we may need to take that route."

Castiel sat there in a haze as his brother and doctor talked about his treatment options.

…

 **I know this chapter was mainly Castiel focused, but don't worry, we will be getting to Dean next chapter!**


End file.
